Monday, May 14, 2012

Look Who's Back!

I'm back, motherfuckers.

That's right. And I have quite a few stories to tell.

First off I should start by saying that Eden is no longer with us. I honestly wish I had done it myself, but that probably would have been rather difficult, being all tied up and shit. I'm not going to go into deep detail about this, since I'd like to be as brief as possible. Maybe you can look forward to a better explanation of my sudden disappearance once I've gotten my point across. And what is my point exactly? I'm just here to make a proposition. The business is out. Deals have been made. I'm done with the Siblings' bullshit and guilt and fucking emotions. It's been...what...a year? Two? As if I keep track anymore. Since the last time I posted, my only thoughts have been whether I'm still alive or in hell yet. Sure, I thought about going back, changing my name again, even checking the blogs to see if I still had a sliver of a chance left, but what is that worth? Even if I clawed my other eye out, I still couldn't unsee the damage I've done ever since I escaped the goddamn Cage. There's no childhood innocence left to save me from the future. I've already accepted the fact that my past can't be undone, but for a while there, I actually thought there could be another future. I guess what changed that was the death of DeMii. Seeing that maybe if I'd stayed, she'd be alive and I could be the kind of aunt I should have been until my selfishness overpowered the flicker of love that had kept me going up until Nameless replaced Trinity. It was like life had no purpose but to eventually bring on death. But whatever. Fuck then. This is now, and now is all there's left to maybe make something of myself.
So here it is.

I have a deal for you, Advocate. This is the one time I'll ever need you. Or anyone at all. And god, you're the only thing I can think of that can change me right now. I need you to help me. But what do you need me for?